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Home / Home Slider / How to help your child learn to drive

How to help your child learn to drive

February 12, 2016 by Gretta Schifano 10 Comments

L-plates and Highway Code. Copyright Gretta Schifano

L-plates and Highway Code. Copyright Gretta Schifano

My first driving lesson wasn’t a success. I was keen to learn to drive as soon as I was old enough, as were all of my friends in the rural area where I grew up. We were fed up with walking and cycling everywhere, and we wanted access to Saturday jobs and the freedom to go where we wanted, when we wanted. As soon as I was 17, I badgered and badgered my parents to teach me to drive. But, (possibly because our family vehicles at the time were a pair of  VW camper vans, one of which was  left-hand drive), neither of them was at all enthusiastic about teaching me, and they kept putting me off.

My first driving lesson

Eventually Dad gave in and agreed to teach me. So I sat in the driver’s seat of the VW (the right-hand drive one) and waited for him to tell me what to do. Dad said:

‘Go on then, drive!’

I had absolutely no idea how to drive. I didn’t even know how to start the engine. Dad must have explained something to me because, somehow, I drove down our drive and along the road, while he got crosser and crosser and I got more and more stressed. A short way along our road we met a car coming towards us and Dad grabbed the steering wheel and steered the van along the grass verge. I can’t remember what happened after that, but I don’t think that it was a long lesson.

Thankfully, I did go on to have lessons with a driving instructor. It took me four attempts and several years (I stopped trying while I was at University), but I eventually passed my driving test the summer that I graduated. I didn’t own a car, but being able to drive felt like the world had opened up to me. I’m not sure that driving the Pacific Coast Highway as a newly qualified driver was entirely sensible, but it seemed like a brilliant idea to my friend and I at the time, and we had a fantastic trip.

That's me in my twenties, driving the Pacific Coast Highway as a newly qualified driver. Eeek! Copyright Gretta Schifano

That’s me, driving the Pacific Coast Highway as a newly qualified driver. Eeek! Copyright Gretta Schifano

Cost of learning to drive

One of the main reasons that I wanted my parents to teach me to drive was, of course, the cost of driving lessons. Car buying and selling website Carfused.com have worked out that the average cost of learning to drive in the UK is now £774 (including buying a provisional licence, driving lessons, theory and practical tests) and they have carried out some research into the experience of learning to drive. Their survey of 2,000 UK motorists found that:

  • Almost half (49%) of the drivers surveyed took lessons with a parent or another family member;
  • 15% of those surveyed were yelled at repeatedly by their parents when they were learning to drive;
  • 15% of the respondents describe being taught to drive by a parent as scary;
  • 10% of respondents said that their parent grabbed the wheel while teaching them to drive;
  • 5% of the drivers said that they almost had an accident while learning to drive with a parent.

Helping your child to learn to drive

As soon as she was 17, my daughter was as keen to learn to drive as I was at her age. She had a couple of lessons before she was 17: one with Young Driver and the other at the Goodwood Under-17s Driving Academy. Once she was old enough, she had lessons out on the roads with a professional instructor. When he said that she was ready, we insured her to drive our Fiat Panda, so that she could practice with us. I went out with her to help her to practice, and I’m pleased to say that I never felt the need to grab the steering wheel.

Based on my own experience of learning to drive, and of helping my daughter as she learnt to drive, I think that the best way to support your child as they learn to drive is to be supportive and encouraging and to stay calm.

Over to you

Did you learn to drive with an instructor or with a family member? Have you taught your child to drive? What are your tips on supporting kids when they learn to drive?

More on learning to drive

Do read my other posts about kids learning to drive:

Young Driver: driving lessons for kids

Goodwood under-17s driving academy

Disclosure: This post is sponsored by Carfused.com

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Related

Categories: Parenting teens, Teens, Travel advice
Tags: learning to drive

About Gretta Schifano

I'm a freelance journalist and blogger specialising in family travel with teenagers, trips when parents manage to travel without their kids, and 50+ travel. I also write about vegetarian travel, parenting teenagers, adoption, SEN, ADHD and anxiety. My work's been published by the Financial Times, Guardian, Independent, National Geographic Traveller, Lonely Planet and others. I've lived and worked in Italy and Spain and am now based in rural south-east England with my husband, adoptive and birth kids and our dog. I previously worked as a social action radio producer for the BBC.

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Comments

  1. REVs says

    February 27, 2019 at 1:12 pm

    It really helped when you said that we can actually choose an instructor that we would be comfortable with instead of letting them assign a random one. I think that is important to really learn well. I will keep this in mind when I look for a driving school for my son since he is old enough to drive for us. We also plan to surprise him with a used car for his birthday, so he should really learn how to drive fast. Thanks!

    Reply
  2. Penelope Smith says

    September 28, 2018 at 2:14 am

    My little sister just turned fifteen, and she wants to start learning how to drive soon. So, I liked that you pointed out that about 15 percent of people who are taught to drive by a parent find the experience scary. My parents have some bad driving habits, one of which is road rage. It might be better for her to learn how to drive from a professional instructor.

    Reply
  3. Driving School Franchise says

    October 24, 2016 at 10:38 am

    My advice as a qualified driving instructor would be to do your research before booking your first driving lesson. Unfortunately, there are a lot of companies and self employed instructors that offer the world and a quick first time pass but fail to actually teach you how to be safe on the roads.

    Invest in a highway code manual and study it as often as you can. This will help you with your theory test and practical driving.

    Reply
    • Gretta Schifano says

      October 24, 2016 at 1:30 pm

      Good advice – thank you!

      Reply
  4. Veronica says

    February 13, 2016 at 1:47 pm

    I had a similar experience with my dad who took me out after my first couple of lessons: I was fine driving along a very quiet road which but as soon as another car appeared Dad yelled at me which made me panic and drive off the road into a ditch! He never took me out again (possibly his nerves were already shredded by years of driving practice with my 2 elder sisters). Mum would simply clutch the door handle and wince and occasionally shriek “MY INSURANCE!” Again, not very encouraging!
    P.s. You were a fab driver in California, especially in the one way systems in San Fran!

    Reply
    • Gretta Schifano says

      February 14, 2016 at 4:03 pm

      That all sounds very stressful! Not sure about those one way systems, they were very tricky – I’d probably never driven on one before!

      Reply
  5. JaneW says

    February 13, 2016 at 10:32 am

    Oh Gretta, this reminds me of my one and only driving lesson with my mum when I was 17. I was the “academic” member of the family so everyone made it clear that I was far too dizzy to learn to drive: “Keep death off the roads!” they said, and my dad kissed the car before we set off. Well, there was a lot of shouting and I didn’t sit behind the wheel again until I had my first job after uni. After lots of professional lessons I passed the test first time and sprang the surprise on my family. I haven’t driven much since then so I won’t be teaching my daughter to drive. I wonder if hypnotherapy would help……

    Reply
    • Gretta Schifano says

      February 14, 2016 at 4:04 pm

      I can’t believe that your family said that to you, you poor thing!

      Reply
  6. Mum/Jenny says

    February 12, 2016 at 7:31 pm

    Oh dear! I do hope I was more patient than your Dad. I do remember taking you out quite a lot after you had some lessons. I have to say that other than learning to drive myself, being with all my children when they were learning to drive was very stressful It’s even worse when they have passed the Driving test when they are off on their own for the first time

    Reply
    • Gretta Schifano says

      February 13, 2016 at 7:27 am

      I can’t remember you taking me out, which probably means that you were very calm! xxxx

      Reply

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This is a personal blog written and edited by me, Gretta Schifano. Sometimes I’m given products or sent on trips to review, but I always make this clear and give my honest opinion. See my About page for full details.

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